My old jacket

As I explained in a recent post, I've had to purge my closet many times over during this weight-loss journey because clothes become too baggy within a few months; and when I say "baggy," I mean the articles of clothing look like tents on me when they once fit me perfectly. 

People are conspiring with Fla against me!!!

For the past few months, Flaminia ("Fla"), my trainer, has been pushing me to start dating again.  She's been bugging me for months to set up a profile on match.com.  Since I had no interest whatsoever in doing that, Fla threatened that she'd do it for me as a Christmas present or a going-away gift before she moves to New York. 

Getting stronger!!!

This is one of my favorite exercises only because I can do it really well and it shows how much stronger I'm getting.

A great problem to have (my closet)

From what I can remember, in 1998/1999, when I was in my late 30s, I weighed around 230 lbs. after losing some weight by working out at a gym, walking around the neighborhood, and cooking more frequently. 

Three years ago this week

Little did I know three years ago this week that I was about to start a journey that would change my life in countless ways.  Today I'm a completely different person, inside and out, than the me just three years ago.  In many ways, I don't even recognize the "old" me and I often marvel about how much I've changed.  Many times I catch myself thinking, "Who IS this Vilma???"  Some of my friends ask the same thing.

The killer muffin!!! UGH!

I have a terrible sweet tooth and my downfall is baked goods, specifically pastries or cakes.  I try to stay away from these because I know I can't control myself very well, even today.

Grocery shopping

I always saw grocery shopping as just a nuisance, particularly when I was working.  Back then I had little free time as it was and going to the grocery store to push a cart with a bad, squeaky wheel (I have a knack for choosing bad carts) around the same aisles to get the same products every time, then lug them all onto the conveyor belt, put the bags in the car, then lug the bags into the house so I could put everything away was just a big, dreaded time-consuming chore. 

My first second anniversary with Fla!

Nope, that wasn't a typo.  I really mean it when I say, "My first second anniversary" with Flaminia ("Fla"), my trainer.  As I explained under "The omens and the blue-haired tormentor," I met Fla on August 19, 2014, the day after I joined my gym, Total Woman.

The #1 question people ask me

Whenever I encountered someone who had lost a ton of weight, my first question was always the same, "How did you do it?"  If I had bet this would be the first question posed to me as well, I would have lost the bet.  It's usually the second question I'm asked.

Feeling sad and a bit lost

If you've been reading my blog, you know what an amazing influence Flaminia ("Fla"), my trainer, has been to me this past year.  Prior to meeting her, I lost 40 lbs. on my own in almost two years, but it wasn't until I met Fla that things really turned around for me.  Thanks to her, I've lost over 80 lbs. since we met just a little over a year ago in August 2014.

Kids in a candy store

Whenever my job sent me out of town to attend a meeting, a training class, or a seminar, it always fascinated me that I was the only one in the group not  obsessed with food.  It never failed, the number one topic among my co-workers every day was, "Where are we going to eat?"

Get help to start your healthier lifestyle

A friend recently emailed me to say she hired a nutritionist to lose weight and then added, "I know you'll disapprove because you did it on your own."  I don't know why she thought I'd disapprove because in reality I thought it was a great idea.  

Eating on the run

I don't need GPS to find fast food restaurants within a 20-mile radius of my house.  I know where all the McDonalds, Jack In The Boxes, Carl's Juniors, KFCs, Taco Bells, Del Tacos, and Burger Kings are because these places fed me weekly (sometimes daily) for many years.  Then there was Panda Express now and again as well as pizza I'd order once or twice a month.  El Pollo Loco wasn't neglected either.

Vilma the clown or the hooker?

For my birthday/weighing-in-the-100s-celebratory dinner with Flaminia ("Fla"), my trainer, a couple of weeks ago, I wore make-up for the first time in decades.  In fact, most of my friends have never seen me in make-up.  My best friend, Joyce, who's known me since I was 18 years old said, "Oh, my God, it's been so long since I've seen you dolled up, I don't think I'd recognize you!"

Awakening from my coma

One of the most notable changes recently in my thinner universe is that everything feels like a new experience, a very pleasant one at that.  In some ways I feel like I've awakened from a coma and now I'm experiencing the world again. 

Best compliment ever: who are you?

Although I received a few compliments here and there about my weight loss along the way, it wasn't until I lost about 95 lbs. that people started to really notice.  Suddenly I no longer heard, "Have you lost some weight?" and instead started hearing, "How much have you lost?!"  The reactions since have been even greater, from amazing to unbelievable.

Vanity sizing

Have you ever heard of vanity sizing?  It's also known as size inflation.  I hadn't until recently.  Apparently, in order to sell more clothes, the garment industry started assigning smaller sizes to articles of clothing.  This means that what's a size 14 today used to be about a size 20 in the past. 

Back on track!!!!!!!!

If you've been reading my recent posts, you know that I've been struggling for several weeks.  When I struggle, it means I'm having binging episodes or trying to fight the urge to binge, but usually it's the former. 

My birthday week!

My 55th birthday was this week and on my actual birthday, Vilma Luck struck and ruined my day.

Still struggling, but hanging in there

I explained in my prior post(s) that whenever I'm on track, the motivation I feel that allows me to succeed is palpable.  When I'm motivated, it's so easy to stay on track that I wonder why I couldn't do it when I was younger.  When I feel like this, the idea of eating bad foods or having a downright binging episode doesn't even enter my mind for a second no matter what happens in my life.

She's baaccckkk!!!!

In August, my trainer, Flaminia ("Fla"), left for about two weeks to attend The Burning Man Festival in the desert near Reno, Nevada.  She didn't have cell phone reception in the desert so we didn't communicate at all during that time.  Fla left me a strict workout schedule which I followed during her absence.  My weight didn't budge.

Thank you, DMV!

About 15 years ago, I walked into a California Department of Motor Vehicles ("DMV") office to have my driver's license renewed.  In California, licenses are good for five years.  I can't remember specifically how much I weighed at the time, but I'd guess it was around 230 lbs. 

Struggling again (binging)

People often ask me how I conquered binging.  The reality is I haven't figured out how to stop binging, although I've learned to control it better - but only just a little bit and only sometimes.  I still struggle from time to time when life gets me down...

Peer pressure at the gym

Going to the gym is a humiliating experience when you're morbidly obese (or, God forbid, super morbidly obese).  In general, you already feel self-conscious about how you look but there are certain places, like the gym, where that's especially pronounced... 

Caught again!

My trainer, Flaminia ("Fla"), hasn't monitored my food diary in many months because I got the hang of it.  The evidence has been that the scale numbers keep going down, albeit slowly.  I've been very good on my own, but, somehow, she seems to know when I stray.  I think she's got a built-in "Vilma radar."  GRRRRR!!!!!!

My latest reward to myself: cycling shoes!

I explained in my earlier post titled "Rewarding success with food" that instead of rewarding my weight-loss success with food like I always did before, nowadays I reward myself by sometimes buying something that I can use to continue my journey...

I'm so proud of myself (spin story) !

Yesterday I went to TWO spin classes:  my regular Monday morning class at Total Woman ("TW"), my gym, then I trained with Flaminia ("Fla"), my trainer, in the afternoon (we worked on arms), and in the evening Fla subbed at a hoity-toity gym in downtown Los Angeles and she invited me to attend her spin class.  I can't believe I said, "Sure." 

Rewarding success with food

When I had lost about 40 lbs. through Weight Watchers by late spring of 2013, I told a friend about my success and then added, "I did so well that I went out and got a piece of cake to celebrate."  Her response completely caught me off guard...

Trappings of unhappiness

For many years I've felt trapped.  Trapped by my weight, trapped by my finances, trapped by my dilapidated house, trapped by the clutter in my house, trapped by my stressful job......